Summertime and thoughts on the language barrier

Summertime favorites: sangria, sun, and swimming

I'm in the midst of my summer vacation in Albuquerque, and I decided to write about something that has been on my mind quite a bit this summer: the language barrier. Probably the most common question I've been asked after coming back is, "So are you fluent in Spanish now?"  This is actually a very difficult question for me to answer. In my opinion, first you have to define what it means to be "fluent" in a language. To help me out, I looked it up in a very reliable source: wikipedia.

"Language fluency is used informally to denote broadly a high level of language proficiency, most typically foreign language or another learned language, and more narrowly to denote fluid language use, as opposed to slow, halting use. .... Native [or bilingual] language speakers are often incorrectly referred to as fluent."

Learn Spanish: check

By this definition, yes I would definitly say I am a fluent Spanish speaker: I can speak fluidly, I can converse natually with a friend, I can say basically anything I want (granted the wording might be awkward), and I have good comprehension. So, Yay! Check that one off the bucket list!  

 HOWEVER, before you get too excited, let's talk about what "fluency" means in day-to-day life:
Do I still feel a bit lost in group conversations? definitely
Am I always the last person to understand the joke? every time
Is it difficult to communicate on a deeper level? unfortunately sometimes yes
Do I get weird looks from the supermarket ladies when I ask where a product is? yep (haha)

How do you say, "Speak slower please!"

The reason I think about this topic so often is because being back in the states I am constantly struck by all of a sudden HOW EASY it is to be social when there is no language barrier! I never truely appreciated the simplicity of communication until I jumped into a world where communication for me typically involved a high level of concentration and occasional what I like to call "sentence pre-planning". Its also strange because I feel less like the social butterfly that I am at big gatherings, and I see myself becoming more of the wallflower- a change I don't like. I have to make an intentional effort to show my true personality as I become more experienced, comfortable, and confident speaking the language. (Meanwhile explaining to people that I am just sitting around and smiling like a weirdo because my brain is too tired for conversation) I think what people fail to realize is that the gap between "fluency" and "bilingual" is a very fluid gap (pardon the pun...). For example, one moment you might feel great about your ability, the next day your confidence will be shattered by a confusing conversation. (These moments are always followed by self questioning, "Will I EVER sound smarter than a Spanish 5th grader?")

So, I guess the long answer to the question, "Are you fluent?"  would be, "Yes- but I still have a very long road ahead of me."